Fuzz’s Top 5: Women I Don’t Find Attractive
May 21st, 2007 by Fuzz
If I could have fit it in, the full title for this edition of Fuzz’s Top Five would have been, “Fuzz’s Top 5: Women I Don’t Find Attractive, Though Everybody Else Seems to Think So.”
Let’s do it:
Angelina Jolie:
There is something about this woman that I simply cannot stand. I don’t know if it is the way she holds herself, the fact that she was with Billy Bob Thorton and carried a vile of his blood around her neck, or just because she looks like a drowned sewer rat. Either way, people think she’s hot, and I simply don’t.
Jennifer Aniston:
First, and no offense to those of you who liked the show, Friends, but I could not stand that show. I would have easily lumped Courtney Cox into this Top Five, but she’s irrelevant. Unlike most people, when I see Jennifer Aniston, I think, “ick.”
Lindsay Lohan:
My mom told me never to pick on those less fortunate… but I can’t resist. Watching this girl deteriorate is like watching a train derail, only to have a crew put it back on the tracks so that they can watch it derail again. She’ll be dead before she’s 30. (how’s your dead pool doing, btw?)
Paris Hilton:
This is the woman that I usually get the most ridicule from when I say that I don’t think she’s all that hot. In fact, Squirrel once said to me, “whatever, man… you’d hit that.” Uhm… no. Not even with your “!!!!” and Claude pushing… alright.
Cameron Diaz:
I thought she was cute in “The Mask.” After the first time I heard her open her mouth, though, I was instantly turned off. I mean… no deal. I have a “thing” for intelligent women. Cameron Diaz may be intelligent - but if you’ve ever heard her talk, she sounds like she has the IQ of a nematode.
There you go. You may love them. The world may think they’re hot. I, however, think they’re not.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:32 am
I could not agree with you more on Angelina Jolie. Or Cameron Diaz. OR Hohan. Just awful. The fact that some men find AJ “hot” or “sexy” makes my stomach turn a little!
May 21st, 2007 at 7:38 am
I’m not sure I want to admit this, Fuzz, but I think you and I have the same taste in women.
May 21st, 2007 at 7:41 am
Fuzz’s Top 5: Things You’ll Never Hear Me Say:
1. Wendy, I think you and I have the same taste in men.
…
May 22nd, 2007 at 4:44 pm
Ok, ok, ok… let’s not get carried away here. I’m in pretty much complete agreement with Fuzz on this one (with the exception of Aniston), the women listed here are generally considered hot and for some reason they really don’t do much for me. That being said, when our druken discussion turned to whether or not you would “do” these women, the whole rules of the game changed. I still have a hard time believing that when faced with a buck naked Paris Hilton whispering sexy sweet nothings into his ear that Fuzz could throw up his two fingers and give her the “peace out” as he walked away from her untouched.
May 22nd, 2007 at 6:44 pm
Jen Aniston should not be on the list! Fuzz forgot when he used to watch her on Friends then spend quality time alone.
May 22nd, 2007 at 9:30 pm
Squiz… I would easily give her the two finger salute and “just say no to __insert_std_here__.”
Brent… yeah, uhm, no.
May 22nd, 2007 at 9:46 pm
Paris has squidwards nose and a carp’s lips . . . Cameron looks like a frog. Angelina? No. Others for me: Fergie, Eva Longoria, Jessica Biel, Christina Aguilera . . . all in Maxim’s top 10. I don’t get it. Jen Aniston though . . . I could spend some time around that.
May 23rd, 2007 at 5:16 am
Aniston is a head case!!!!!!!!!!
May 23rd, 2007 at 9:00 pm
Well, they ALL are. It’s just a matter of degrees. Anyway, she’s a cute head case. Rockin’ bod.