Archive for the 'My Theory' Category

My Theory on Warren Sapp's hit against Chad Clifton

Wednesday, November 27th, 2002 by Fuzz

For those of you who don’t know, I played football from when I was 12 until I graduated high school. (I think I was 22?.. j/k) I was an offensive lineman, but I had to practice as a defensive lineman during the defesive part of practice.

Okay, okay, I’ll get to the point… I believe it was Coach Hoagland who taught us, “whenever there is an interception, you hit whoever you can find, as hard as you can, until the whistle blows.” That’s what playing defense is all about. Warren Sapp did just what he had been taught since he was a kid. Hit somebody, and hit ‘em hard. It didn’t help Chad that Warren is one of the best defensive players in the NFL. It also didn’t help that Chad didn’t follow the rule that offensive linemen everywhere have learned since junior high: “Always keep your head on a swivel.”

Don’t get me wrong, I am a huge fan of Chad Clifton. In fact, I wore #76 my senior year of high school, so there is kind of a soft spot in my heart for Chad. It’s too bad that this had to happen, but it is football, and it is a very rough sport.

I hope Chad get’s better, and I’m sure that he will, but Warren didn’t do anything wrong (at least as the hit goes), but that’s just my theory.

P.S. Coach Sherman was right confronting Warren. Warren wasn’t right for cheering about Chad’s injury.

Of Course, that’s just My Theory.

My Theory on why Brett Favre sucked against the Minnesota Vikings

Monday, November 18th, 2002 by Fuzz

This is an old one - [funny pics of Brett getting angry omitted from this elderly article]
Definition: claustrophobia
Miller-Keane Medical Dictionary, 2000

(klaws-tro-fo-be-ah) irrational fear of being shut in; fear of enclosed spaces, such as elevators, tunnels and metrodomes.

Now, it may have not been diagnosed, but I know that I have it. Clasutrophobia, the fear of being trapped or shut in. I get it whenever I am driving around large buildings. Brett gets it whenever he ventures into the murky basement know as the metrodome.

When I experience symptoms I become tense, I tend to swear alot, and even the tiniest distraction turns into a gigantic annoyance.

If you noticed Brett’s demeanor, he was swearing, throwing things, getting penalties… basically having a hissy fit!

Now, having Claustrophobia doesn’t mean that you puke everytime you get into an elevator. I love elevators, and I am not afraid of heights. I just don’t like being at the bottom of a tall building, I feel like it is going to fall right on top of me. Brett probably doesn’t mind elevators either, I’m sure we would hear about it if that was the case. I do think that Brett suffers from Metrodomeaphobia, which is not in the medical dictionary I looked up before, but we have all seen the symptoms… at least 9 of the last 11 times Green Bay has played there.

Of course, I could just be looking for any way to compare myself to Brett Favre, but that’s just my theory.